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-- Communicating in Development of the Social Self Environment


How Do You Say “ I Love You”? Why is it so hard to say those three magical words ,(I Love You)?

With all the lines of communication it seems that engaging in any other topic such as hate talk; joy talk; peace and pain talk are easily . Let the topic of saying I Love You come into the picture and a different tune begins to play. Why is this?

Even as a child , you were often told I Love You by your parents. When you got hurt mama would kiss you and say , “I Love You” and that boo-boo would feel so much better. You were always advised to talk about the joy , fears and hurts in your life. To this very day it is still very difficult to say this positive statement. “I Love You.” Everyone that is human has a degree of language . You may be confused about how you learned it . As a baby you learned a language , not taught by your parents. You had to take steps in learning this. First , you babbled; then you began to say words; and lastly you put the words together and made a sentence. All this was done on your own as a child. Children are fast at catching on to words and the proper way to use them. Why is it so hard for adults?

As an adult , you either hear the language of love or you don’t. Sometimes when you are awaken from a dream, and it was one where lovers looked into each others eyes, a simple harmony falls over you and you experience the urge to tell your partner you love them. Wouldn’t it be wonderful to have such an open line of communication all the time? It would be very nourishing and rewarding in a healthy relationship.

Once you have an open line of communication, have you thought of how you will keep it open? It is very true that communication is more than what you allow your ears to hear. Words are wonderful, and shouldn’t be taken likely. Words of love stand for things. Love is an affection shown toward another. It may be towards a parent, child, or lover. For each word that a human speaks , there is an emotion attached to it.

Often you may find yourself being talked too, by a smile or even a handshake. Hugs and laughter are other forms of communication. Some of these gestures may speak louder than the actual words. You can tell a great deal about a person with just a simple handshake. A hug has been known to send off mixed signals . A glance can suggest a variety of things. Still, people don’t respect the power of wordless messages. Maybe the message of “I Love You” was given by one of the above gestures. Some people find it very hard to voice these three simple words.

It is essential that humans know how to communicate when they are using certain words. People need to control their words. With each word comes a definition and feeling. This is only when one can take control of their lives. The words people use in a real sense can determine the action and belief of others. Use these words generously rather than be narrowed by them. Misunderstanding begins to cause problems in a relationship when words aren’t used properly.

Unless you like talking to yourself , take some advice and remember it takes two to carry on a conversation. This truly means that if your partner is speaking , you better be listening. The majority of the time , by the time someone has said what they wanted to say the other party has forgot half of it. They are only prepared to hear what they want too. So the next time you want to say “I Love You” make sure you are using the proper words or let the wordless message be shown by the gestures you have waited so long to express.



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