Does discipline really change the behavior of children?

Article Written By: Mark Lakewood, CEO

Have you come to the conclusion that no discipline is effective on your child? Do you sometimes change your discipline in search of the most effective one to use on your child? If you are experiencing any of these thoughts or feelings today, I would like for you to make some consideration.

Have you ever wondered why so many people commit murder when they know the consequence is the death penalty or a lifetime in prison?

Never rely or count on discipline to affect the behavior of your child. Discipline was never intended to have an effect on your child. The only thing that discipline provides is a consequence to misbehavior, something that should occur automatically after your child misbehaves. Whether or not the discipline has any positive impact on your child relies specifically on your child and what he/she thinks as a result of the discipline.

If your child wants to change his/her behavior, he/she can only do so by his/her own free will. The discipline your child receives can only act as a deterrent to misbehavior but may not have any overall effect on your child s thoughts.

Your child, like everyone else, needs to take ownership and responsibility of his/her own thoughts, feelings, and behavior. These thoughts and feelings have nothing to do with external events but rather on our interpretation of those events. Therefore for some children, it takes only one time disciplined to change behavior while other children require more frequent discipline.

Believing that discipline changes the behavior of children negatively effects discipline efficacy and parental authority. Oftentimes parents change the discipline to meet the needs of a specific child. A parent with more than one child might render a variety of disciplines to their children (a unique discipline per child) for the same misbehavior making discipline rather difficult, overbearing, and frustrating. Oftentimes children manipulate by making their parents believe that no discipline is effective by simply misbehaving either during or directly after the discipline ends. This usually occurs with children whose parents have a history of giving up on discipline after coming to the conclusion that no discipline is effective.

In conclusion, it is my recommendation that you enforce whatever discipline you feel appropriate for your child given a specific misbehavior provided that the discipline is an appropriate consequence to the specific misbehavior. Continue to enforce that discipline to your child regardless of how many times he/she engages in the same misbehavior. Just keep in mind that the decision to change behavior is strictly up to your child and not based on the discipline that you choose to impose. When your child begins to realize that you are consistent with discipline by refusing to be manipulated by continued misbehavior, he/she will eventually end his/her misbehavior.

About the Author

Mark Lakewood, CEO of Building Strong Families National Seminars, is an author and speaker with over 20 years of clinical experience as a family therapist. He facilitates The Sudden Compliance Program Webinar Series.

You Can Link Directly to "Does discipline really change the behavior of children?" by using the url:
http://www.allbestarticles.com//family/parents/does-discipline-really-change-the-behavior-of-children.html

This Article Has Been Published on Fri, 27 Nov 2009 and Read 953 Times

Find All Best Articles at http://www.allbestarticles.com

Rating: Not yet rated

Comments

No comments posted.

Add Comment

You do not have permission to comment. If you log in, you may be able to comment.

Related information on Parents

Being a Good Single Parent
Parents Of Troubled Teenagers Struggle At Home Everyday
A Few Fast Tips On Baby Carriers And Baby Slings
Picking a Child Care Center for Your Young Child: Some Important Considerations
Irish Baby Names and Spanish Baby Names
The Mom Anxiety Factor: How to Cope
My Daughters Are Growing Up Too Fast, And It Needs To Stop
Does discipline really change the behavior of children?
What Are The Most Effective Parenting Tips (2-12 Year Olds)?
Solutions To Child Behavior Problems
Be On The Lookout For Child Behavior Problems
Different Types Of Child Behavior Problems You May Want To Know About
Dealing With Temper Tantrums
How To Organize Your Kids Room
The Complex Simplicity of Raising Your Child
Kids Canada Clothing Can Be Affordable At A Discount Store
There Is No Need To Pay Full Price When You Can Buy Carters Clothing Online
Use an Online Clothing Store to Save Money
Suggestions for Baby Toys Gifts For The Holidays
Education: The Dreaded SATS - A Child's and Parent's Nightmare!
How to Deal with the Needs of your Special Child
Baby Carriers - Much More Efficient Than Ever Before
Bullying an Ongoing Threat to Today's Teens
Make Baby Night Nursing Easy
Ensuring School Success for Your Child