Telling Kids about Divorce? Avoid These Mistakes.
Article Written By: RosalindSedacca,CCT
Getting psyched up to tell your children about your pending divorce, or separation? Not sure what to say? When to say it? How to say it? What to expect after the conversation? What to do next? What therapists, mediators, attorneys, clergy and other professionals suggest you do and don't do to make things better all around? Well, you're not alone.
Here are the mistakes most commonly made by parents. Be sure you dont add stress to your childrens lives by making these errors. * Asking children to bear the weight of making decisions or choosing sides. Children love both parents naturally and feel guilty when being asked to make choices. Make those choices for them. * Forgetting to emphasize that your children are innocent. Often children blame themselves for their parents failed marriage. It is important to remind the kids often that they played no part in the decision to divorce. They are not to blame. * Confiding adult details to children so as to attract their allegiance or sympathy. Kids are confused and burdened by this complex emotional information. Share it with your friends or professional counselors, not with your children. The good news is there is lots of help available to you from qualified professionals. For a peaceful divorce, try mediation or an attorney specializing in the Collaborative Divorce model. Family therapists are always an excellent resource. You can also reach out to clergy, guidance counselors in the schools or professional coaches who handle divorce and family issues. In addition many outstanding books and articles provide expertise on this subject. However you approach this challenging conversation, be prepared. Understand the effects andquot; both emotionally and psychologically andquot; this news can have on your children. Learn how to avoid the common mistakes parents make when they havent done their homework in advance. You and your children can survive -- and even thrive -- after divorce.About the Author
Rosalind Sedacca, Certified Corporate Trainer and divorce seminar facilitator, is the author of the new ebook, How Do I Tell the Kids about the Divorce? A Create-a-Storybook Guide to Preparing Your Children " with Love! To learn more about the ebook, visit http://www.howdoitellthekids.com. For free articles, free ezine and other valuable resources for parents, visit: www.childcentereddivorce.com.
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